My Left Footloose

Dark Secrets Revealed About One of the Greatest Love Stories Never Told

Miss Beatrix Potter is a young woman whose mother has forbidden her to enter the local school of sorcery. However, the temptation is too much. She applies, is accepted, and attends the school where she learns all about wishing and mycology. When an amorous changeling half-rabbit/half-man named Harry begins chasing her about campus, Miss Potter uses all of her powerful education to transform herself into a scarecrow and frighten him away.

Miss Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

Cheat sheet Miss Potter | Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

Contributor Dawn
Editor Miss Spell

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Won't you come with me, little girl, on a magic carpet ride? | Leapin' Lepus!

Not all imaginary giant rabbits are our friends.

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And Also, She’s Just a Liar.

A single mother working as a hotel maid (Jennifer Lopez) is mistaken for a nuclear physicist by a visiting senatorial candidate (John Lithgow). She falls in love, he gets her a grant for some plutonium, which her son (Christopher Collett) uses to build an atomic bomb for a high school science fair. Tense standoff as Lithgow and Collett try to defuse his bomb while surrounded by the army, and Lopez confesses her true identity, fearing that the gulf between her and Lithgow is too broad for them to cross.

Maid in the Manhattan Project

Cheat sheet Maid in Manhattan | The Manhattan Project

Contributor Rick
Editor Rick

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Son, you got a panty on your head. | And How Much of Your Brain do You Need to Use to Avoid Bears?

The premise of The Manhattan Project is that a high school student builds an atomic bomb for a science project. There’s a lovely 80’s style montage of him spending weeks doing the research near the beginning of the movie. Of course, he didn’t have the InterWebs to help him. This is the result of three minutes of searching on YouTube.

You Gotta Graduate To Be Insane. Losing Your Mind Is Not A Luxury For The High School Class.

A high school hottie, the eponymous Beth (that cheerleader chick from Heroes), goes into a blue funk when her much-older boyfriend Gerry (that Scottish dude who was the Phantom of the Opera) dies of a brain tumor. Then she finds a series of notes he'd written to her, which gradually lead her to a new romance with nerdy valedictorian Denis (some guy I've never heard of before).

P.S., I Love You, Beth Cooper

Cheat sheet P.S., I Love You | I Love You, Beth Cooper

Contributor christo4o
Editor Phil

If you Liked This, You'll Love These I Always Thought It Was A Ridiculous Name For Saturday Detention | Thanks For The Great Lunch And Enema!

Chris Columbus (remember him?) has a new movie, based on a novel by Simpsons scribe Larry Doyle. I Love You, Beth Cooper opens today.

If you had a mother like this, you would need someone to save the day.

A middle-aged widowed eccentric named Beatrice (Courtney Love) and her lover, Andy Kaufman, attend her daughter's school science fair. Uncomfortable hijinx ensue after the daughter's project exposes the lover to a radioactive moon-ray that changes him into an avant guard humorist who interrupts the science fair by taking everyone out for milk and cookies.

The Effect of Gamma Rays on Man On The Moon

Cheat sheet The Effect of Gamma Rays on Man-in-the-Moon Marigolds | Man On The Moon

Contributor Dawn
Editor Miss Spell

If you Liked This, You'll Love These He Rode the Fast Lane Out of This World | Allow Me to Introduce You to my Imaginary Friends

If they can put a man on the moon, why can't they put them all there?

Wolverines! And Other Mammals!

After the events of Ice Age: Meltdown, Manny, Diego, and Sid (Ray Romano, Dennis Leary, and John Leguizamo) are settling down to their new lives when a surprise paratrooper attack by Cuban dinosaurs forces the boys up into the hills, where they wage a guerilla war to keep their home free for the warm blood of patriotism!

Ice Age: Red Dawn of the Dinosaurs

Cheat sheet Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs | Red Dawn

Contributor Rick
Editor Rick

If you Liked This, You'll Love These It’s a Sloth in a Corset | This is the Single Worst Day of My Entire Life!

The Ice Age crowd goes to the well one more time – this time in 3D! Check out the trailer.

She Was Living Among The Strangers!

The carnival comes to town featuring a reunion tour of The Band (Robbie Robertson and... some other people). A young and sexy stripper (Jodie Foster) becomes obsessed with the traveling show and joins them, only to find they are a troupe of zombie undead hellbent on forcing her to play creepy organ hymnals that invoke flash floods to drown the unsuspecting victim audiences.

Carny Of Souls

Cheat sheet Carny | Carnival Of Souls

Contributor Dawn
Editor Miss Spell

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Aim for the Headmaster | Same as it Ever Was"

"Mysterious Mose", a 1930 Betty Boop animation by the Fleischer brothers about singing with ghosts.

Where There Is No Intelligence, There Is Epic Fantasy (Or, Don't Bug Me, I'm a King)

[We briefly considered doing a Thursday Three-Way of bug movies in June. ("June Bugs." Get it?) In the intro, Phil would have said something to the effect that his anal obsessive-compulsive precocious freak-nerd nine-year old self would have impatiently pointed out that "June Bug" is incorrect nomenclature. They are, in fact, May Beetles. But nearly forty years later, mellowed by good food, better beer, and selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, Phil is now prepared to accept the popular sobriquet. And besides, it's a B-52s song. As a farewell to June and its bugs, here is one spectacular bug-movie mash-up from Phil.]

To save them from the Blitz, the four Pevensie children are sent to the countryside to stay with their uncle, eccentric entomologist Dr. Nils Hellstrom. There they travel through a mystic portal to a strange realm where insects rule. With Tilda Swinton as the evil sorceress Thysania, James McAvoy as Mr. Attagenus, and Liam Neeson as the voice of the messianic Myrmeleo.

The Hellstrom Chronicles of Narnia: The Antlion, The Witch Moth, and the Wardrobe Beetle

Cheat sheet The Hellstrom Chronicle | The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe

Contributor Phil
Editor Phil

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Lion Thing | Would You Like a Krill Sandwich With Your Afternoon Tea?

When I was nine years old my mother took me to see this movie, resulting in nearly four decades of screaming nightmares. Thanks, Mom.

Giant Transforming Robots Saw Me Naked!

Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) heads off to college, only to find that Decepticons have taken over the Alpha Beta fraternity, and the whole Greek Council! Only with the help of the Autobots in the reject fraternity of Lambda Lambda Lambda can Sam hope to mount a war of pranks and make the world safe for the socially challenged!

Transformers: Revenge of the Nerds

Cheat sheet Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen | Revenge of the Nerds

Contributor Rick
Editor Rick

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Bruckheimer’s Feelgood Classic – Fun for the Whole Family! | Lecter: Those Nerds Are a Threat to Our Way of Life

The Tri-Lams and Omega Mu talent segment from Revenge of the Nerds. You just know that some of those instruments turn into robots!

For those of you living on the moon, the new Transformers movie opens today... to spectacularly bad reviews. For some tasty schadenfreude (or even if you're just a connoisseur of awesome movie review writing) check out io9's "Michael Bay Finally Made an Art Movie". And here's the flippin' trailer. Lots of CGI and Megan Fox... and I think there's CGI Megan Fox, too. ~ Jane

The Red Knight’s Looking for You, Rusty James!

Rusty James (Matt Dillon) breaks a gang truce, rumbling with Edwin the Yuppie Hater (Christian Clemenson). In the aftermath, his life falls apart. A chance for redemption comes in the return of his older brother, Parry (Robin Williams), now an insane street person, who leads him on a transformative and enlightening journey to discover the truth about expectations, relationships, responsibility, and forgiveness.

Rumble Fisher King

Cheat sheet Rumble Fish | The Fisher King

Contributor Rick
Editor Rick

If you Liked This, You'll Love These A Tale of Murder, Greed, Lust, Revenge, Teen Angst, Great Hair, and Seafood | Dude, this is a league game. Am I wrong? Am I wrong?

Here's a blending of audio from The Fisher King and video from Excalibur, producing a wonderful retelling of the Fisher King story.

It Ain't Like It Used to Be, But It'll Do.

Greg, Marsha, Peter, Jan, Bobby, Cindy, and Alice face the march of progress, the Mexican army, and a gang of bounty hunters led by Sam the Butcher while they plan a robbery of a U.S. army train. No one (not even Tiger!) is innocent in this gritty tale of coming of age while becoming obsolete.

The Wild Brady Bunch

Cheat sheet The Wild Bunch | The Brady Bunch Movie

Contributor Scott 
Editor Jane

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Fire All of Your Guns at Once and Explode into Space | I Wish I Knew How to Quit You, Doc

It doesn’t get much shootier than The Wild Bunch. Ever since this film hit the theaters in 1969, this final, apocalyptic gun battle has been aped by other directors; either as an homage or in an attempt to out-do the original. None, in my opinion have succeeded. And it’s not just the guns… it’s not just the great actors… it’s the sheer ruthlessness of the firefight. Using women as shields, children firing guns, shooting people in the back, accidentally shooting companions who get in the way… it’s complete mayhem. Even better, it’s not good guys versus bad guys. It is bad guys versus evil guys - lots and lots of evil guys. By this point in the film there is no doubt that William Holden and company are completely ruthless, amoral criminals. But the Mexican warlord, he’s worse than they are, and on an even grander scale. By going out in the blaze of glory, taking out the General and his army, the Wild Bunch know that someone, even if they are illiterate Mexican peasants, will be grateful that they ever existed, and not curse their names when they are gone. ~Scott

The Man Dance

A group of locals in a college town yearn to define their identities and start their lives, so they tune up their bicycles and go on a cross-country kidnapping and crime spree culminating in a brutal gun battle on the field of the local bike racing track.

Breaking Away of the Gun 

Cheat sheet Breaking Away | Way of the Gun

Contributor Scott 
Editor Jane

If you Liked This, You'll Love These We were just outside Barstow, on the edge of the desert...| One Bowler to Rule Them!

The Way of the Gun is chock-full of great lines from memorable characters, horrifying beer-bottle-fu, perhaps the best way to deter a kidnapper I’ve even seen, and a ransom so big that James Caan calls it “a motive with a universal attachment.” Plus the he film stands out for no better reason than they break Sarah Silverman’s nose in the first five minutes. But they weren’t joking when they titled this film. There is some serious gun-fu in this one, and none of it is that stupid John Wu/Chow Yun Fat flying through the air in slow motion while doves fly by as you shoot two pistols akimbo, only to land, throw the empty guns away, and whip two more out of your ass, which clearly has a gun cabinet in it. In The Way of the Gun, walls are shot through, cover isn’t what it appears to be, bullet proof vests don’t cover enough, and amateurs can kill you if you blink... all of it shot in real-time to give it that frantic feel of a gunfight between guys who know what they are doing. ~Scott

Best Shootout Ever! Way of the Gun - Watch more Funny Videos

Won't You Come With Me, Little Girl, on a Magic Carpet Ride?

Harry Potter (Jim Breuer) discovers an old book marked mysteriously "This book is the property of the Half Baked Prince" and teaches his friends Ron (Harland Williams) and Hermione (Guillermo Diaz) a few long-hidden secrets of herbology (ahem). When Ron is sent to Azkaban for accidentally killing Professor McGonagall's diabetic hippogriff with food he purchased on a munchie run, his friends set up an illegal herb racket with wizard-rapper Sir Smokes-a-lot (Dave Chappelle) to bail him out. Magical hijinks ensue.

Harry Potter and the Half-Baked Prince 

Cheat sheet Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince | Half Baked

Contributor scott 
Editor jane

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Avada Kedavra! | Do You Feel Lucky, Dad? Well, Do You?

Today is the birthday of prolific My Left Footloose contributor The Procrastinator (Squeal Like a Pig!, Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.) and we thought we'd celebrate by messing with her favorite actor, Alan Rickman. A gift? This delicious clip of Alan singing... just for you. Happy Birthday!

If that made you cry, buck up with John Sessions' excellent Alan Rickman impression in this excerpt from British panel show QI. Stick around 'til the end for why Rickman actually sounds the way he does.

Souvlaki, With a Side Order of Triffids

A travel guide strikes up a romance with her Greek bus driver as they escort a group of tourists around Greece. But her happiness is short-lived when the tour group stumbles upon a nest of evil man-eating plants in a creepy ancient Greek temple, and everyone dies horribly in searing pain.

My Life in the Ruins

Cheat sheet My Life in Ruins | The Ruins

Contributor Phil
Editor Phil

If you Liked This, You'll Love These You Can't Always Get What You Want | A Scarecrow has Black Eyes, Like a Doll's Eyes

My Life in Ruins opens today.

The General Broke His Ankle, So We Had To Haul Him Around On A Sled.

John Wayne, Richard Burton, Dennis Quaid, and Jake Gyllenhaal race a glacier to invade Normandy, defeat the Nazis, and reverse global warming. Spectacular special effects as the troop ships surf freezing tidal waves over entrenched German positions on the beaches.

The Longest Day After Tomorrow

Cheat sheet The Longest Day | The Day After Tomorrow

Contributor Rick
Editor Rick

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Like Al Gore, Only Without the Cuddly Nobel Prize | Fighting Men From the Sky

What’s missing from this movie? Iron Maiden and Tom Hanks!

Preserved human tissue, Mr Rooney? It's been in my pocket. It's real warm and soft.

High School vice principal Ed Rooney has been trying to catch his student arch nemesis Ferris Bueller all year for truancy. Rooney decides to employ a radical new surgical technique where he has the face of Bueller's best friend transplanted onto his head in order to catch Bueller and expose his game to his parents. Little does Rooney knows that Bueller's alter ego, the Sausage King of Chicago Abe Froman, has a little surprise in store for him.

Ferris Bueller's Face/Off

Cheat sheet Ferris Bueller's Day Off | Face/Off

Contributor Steve
Editor Steve

If you Liked This, You'll Love These When the Moon Hits Your Eye Like a Big Pizza Pie | Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Save Ferris. Or you can turn the page. C'mon, Eileen.

Everytime you see Eric Stoltz looking like an overgrown puppy, an angel gets its wings.

Feeling rejected by Keith while he pursues Amanda Jones, Watts gets drunk and tries to crash her Austin Mini into a freeway embankment, wishing she'd never been born. A skinhead angel sent from heaven (Elias Koteas) shows her how life would be without her which suprisingly looks a lot like Pretty in Pink. Andrew McCarthy makes a cameo appearance as a rich kid with rheumy eyes and no cojones.

It's Some Kind of Wonderful Life

Cheat sheet It's a Wonderful Life | Some Kind of Wonderful

Contributor Kate
Editor Steve

If you Liked This, You'll Love These He Must Practice on Melons or Something | I'm an Excellent Driver, Pilgrim

This is still one of my favorite scenes.

I always thought it was a ridiculous name for Saturday detention.

A free spirited would-be society girl, a writer, a Japanese photographer with an incredibly racist accent and Judd Nelson are sentenced to Saturday detention for making too much noise at a party. By the end of the day they all discover who they really are, head back to the brownstone they share on the upper East side of Manhattan and throw another noisy party which allows the Japanese photgrapher to once again shout "Miss Gorightry!!!"

The Breakfast Club at Tiffany's

Cheat sheet The Breakfast Club | Breakfast at Tiffany's

Contributor Kate
Editor Steve

If you Liked This, You'll Love These By George, I Think She's Got It! | When It Comes to Racing: Side 1 of Led Zeppelin 4

Watch George Peppard get all medieval on Audrey hepburn's ass.

The Thursday Three-Way Goes Back to High School to Get Its Diploma (and ends up with a GED and Mononucleosis)

We at My Left Footloose know that one of the great levelers in life is that we all went to high school. This experience usually included suffering the indignities of chronic acne, the embarrassment of love unrequited, the general awkwardness of experiencing first love (and for those if us who couldn't get dates, the general awkwardness of discovering masturbation), trying to keep up with the latest fashion trends and above all, thinking we were so cool when we were all in reality nothing more than pubescent geeks, dweebs and spazzes. 

For those of us who came of age during his highly successful career, writer-director-producer John Hughes made it all a little less painful to endure with a string of films about teenage life, starting in 1984 with Sixteen Candles. Today's Thursday Three Way smells like teen spirit and looks like Molly Ringwald as we salute those three to four years when our amygdalas ruled the world.

Every Thursday is Three-Way Day at My Left Footloose! Enjoy three (or more) related My Left Footloose movies for the price of one. Tell your friends you're having a three-way and let 'em wonder who with.

Why? WHY?!?!?

Wanderer and Vietnam war veteran John “Lancelot” Rambo (Sylvester Stallone) runs afoul of King Arthur (Sean Connery) in a small town in the kingdom of Camelot, resulting in a chase through the woods. Seeking revenge, Lancelot sneaks back into town wearing a mask and wreaks havoc at the prom attended by King Arthur’s young queen, Guinevere (Jamie Lee Curtis). Falling in love with Guinevere, Lancelot surrenders to the officials and destroys Camelot by seducing its queen.

First Bloody Prom Knight

Cheat sheet First Blood | First Knight | Prom Night

Contributor Rick
Editor Rick

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Do We Get To Win This Time, Jiminy Cricket? | Why Ain’t You Dead?

Is First Knight the greatest movie ever made? You be the judge!

**

Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through the Tang Dynasty, son.

A secret society made up of Chinese renegades takes over the old Delta Tau Chi house at Faber College. threatening to ruin the annual homecoming cerlebration and incur the wrath of Mayor Carmine DiPasto.

Animal House of Flying Daggers

Cheat sheet Animal House | House of Flying Daggers

Contributor Steve
Editor Steve

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Charles de Gaulle is having the worst day of his life..over and over! | The Chinaman is Not the Issue!

If you're looking for a lighter take on Kung Fu movies, Kung Fu Hustle is definitely worth a watch. The humor is wry, the effects awesome for it's budget, and the sparring is well choreographed. Check it out.

Be Excellent To Each Other

Ted (Keanu Reeves) is, like, totally gonna flunk psychology class unless his sister Sybil (Sally Field) can bring her 17 historical personalities to school for his oral presentation. Hilarity ensues when Ted finds himself on a merry chase through suburban California with Napoleon Bonaparte, Sigmund Freud, Genghis Khan, and a traumatized six year old abuse victim. George Carlin co-stars as the psychiatrist who helps Ted determine when the next Sybil will appear, and where.

Sybil & Ted's Excellent Adventure

Cheat sheet Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure | Sybil

Contributor Jersey City Mods 
Editor Jane

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Love Disconnection | Black Listed

Billy Budd Never Had a Lick of Sense. Pass the Biscuits, Please.

One night at a barn dance, Billy Budd (Robbie Benson) gets drunk and has hot, fumbling, and forbidden sex with a sadistic British Navy captain (Peter Ustinov). Terrified and guilty, he flings himself off the Tallahatchee bridge, leaving all of America to speculate as to the reasons for his mysterious suicide. Adapted from the 1967 chart-topping pop song by Herman Mellville.

Ode to Billy Budd

Cheat sheet Ode to Billy Joe | Billy Budd

Contributor Phil
Editor Jane

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Dueling Guitarrones! | The thing is, Sarge, it's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care.

Lest you think that we invented pop song controversies with Madonna's "Papa Don't Preach" (if you're my age) or Brittney's "If You Seek Amy" (if you're younger), think again. As part of a long tradition of thinking way too much about pop messaging, Bobbie Gentry's "Ode to Billy Joe" made a stink back before most of us were born. The song that caused all the stir back in 1967 contains precious few details as to the reason for Billy's suicide. The movie of the same name (in which Glynnis O'Connor learns that her boyfriend Robby Benson might be gay) posits just one of many theories.

Efron Goes Down

Mike O'Donnell (Matthew Perry) has lived a life full of regrets. Suddenly, he reverts back to his 17-year-old self (Zac Efron) who is unexpectedly gay, confused about life, and stuck in the 80s with a whole lotta Thompson Twins hair.

Edge of 17 Again 

Cheat sheet Edge of Seventeen | 17 Again

Contributor Jane
Editor Jane

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Goin' to Home Depot, Maybe Buy Some Flooring... | We're going to have a lovely murderpoo!

17 Again, which could have been just a retooling of '80s body-switcher yawners like 18 Again!, is buzzed to be a surprisingly entertaining examination of the boy inside the man. Who knew? This one's the second feature from the director of Igby Goes Down, another film that was also much better than its trailer.

Start of Something New

When we last saw Chev Chelios (Jason Statham), it appeared as though the assassin had met his maker. Wrong. In this highly anticipated sequel from bubble-gum director Kenny Ortega, Chelios gives his nearly indestructible heart to a shy high school girl with a great singing voice and leaves his old life of vengeance behind for a year of high voltage musical theater and spontaneous cafeteria production numbers. 

Crank: High School Musical 

Cheat sheet Crank: High Voltage | High School Musical

Contributor Jane 
Editor Jane

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Goin' to Home Depot, Maybe Buy Some Flooring... | We're going to have a lovely murderpoo!

Crank: High Voltage, the action-crammed sequel to fan favorite Crank, opens tonight. On the film's profanity-loaded official website, the Flash loader messages make us laugh like little boys.

Roar! You Must Be THIS TALL to Ride This Ride! Roar!

In 1987, a German U-boat takes a wrong turn and ends up a cheesy 1987 Long Island amusement park called Adventureland, where dinosaurs and neanderthals take tickets for rollercoasters, hawk souvenirs, and sell corndogs between semesters at college.

Adventureland that Time Forgot

Cheat sheet Adventureland | The Land that Time Forgot

Contributor jane

Editor jane

If you Liked This, You'll Love These Does the Apatosaurus Have Large Talons? | Me Gotta Have It!